There should be a significant difference between how to discipline gets delivered in play and real.

For example, if you use hand spanking in your play, do not use it as a punishment. Find another way to be spanked with a paddle, for instance.
Your HoH should also explain to you before the punishment happens why you are being punished.

You can also use several types of punishment such as loss of privileges, extra cleaning, lines essays, etc.
Punishments don’t have to be physical, and everyone is different and different things work for different people.