Q: I have followed your posts for some time now and find your thoughts illuminating.
I am curious to know your thoughts on disciplining my bride/wife on the wedding night. My prospective father in law in a very traditional man and when I spoke to him to seek his approval/blessing, he said the responsibility of ensuring that the marriage/family endures is on the husband. It’s for the husband to take charge from day 1 and enforce structure and discipline and make sure the wife is obedient. According to him, “If your wife becomes disobedient, you will only have yourself to blame for that.” Do you believe a proper caning on the wedding night itself is an effective way to set the tone in the marriage?

A: Firstly, have you and your bride discussed living a domestic discipline lifestyle?
Has your bride agreed to live a domestic discipline lifestyle?
If your bride has not consented to this, you should not discipline her. A domestic discipline lifestyle only works if both partners agree to live this way.
I agree with what your father-in-law says.
Regarding your question, should you cane her on your wedding night?
You should only discipline when it has been earned and not just discipline just because you can.
Discipline is not a sexual pleasure act. Being disciplined is for learning and correction.

Suppose you and your bride intend on sexually using spanking in the bedroom. In that case, that is fine as long as you differentiate between pleasure and discipline. They are not and never will be the same.

Having a regular maintenance spanking is also ok some couples find maintenance spanking very beneficial, but using a cane seems harsh, in my opinion, for maintenance.